As you know by now, Squirrel Pelt IS an official name for the mullet. However, this Representation goes beyond the 'funny' name Squirrel Pelt. Let's analyze: The Mullet - Definitely the shape of a squirrel pelt. Next we have the Mullestache/chest hair combo - Chest hair Squirreling it's way up through the collar of a sleeveless shirt reaching the neck area. Mullestache - Making it's way downwards, in the hopes of meeting the upward bound chest hair and the docile mullflap in an orgy of follicle love.

Adding to the the complex associations between hair growth and its fantasy migratory patterns we see a final observation - The simple yet devious expression on this Mulls face. SO squirrelly. It's as if he just finished telling you a complete, unbelievable lie, only to squirrel his way to the corner with his hands cupped near his mouth so he can devour cashew nuts.

Not all mullets are located in Auto parts stores, Monster truck shows and Nascar events. Surprisingly enough many mullets just hang out on street corners. The mullet adds that extra bit of confidence they need to make it appear they are on that corner for a specific purpose. Some appear so confident they seem right at home on that corner - and some literally are.

It makes perfect sense that Jesus would have a mullet. His occupation as a carpenter 2000 years ago is basically the equivilent to a modern day construction worker...and as we know construction workers LOVE the mullet.

Carpenter by trade, Son of God by birth. Happy birthday Jesus.

Firstly, it is important to know what we are talking about when we say "Alpha Male". Well, the definition is: "The dominant or highest ranking male in a social group of animals."

The Alpha Males of our society are the heroes. They will never go out of fashion. They have looks, style and immense confidence, all adding up to that swagger which only comes from a dominant male.

At any party or social situation it will be obvious who the Alpha Male is, to start with, he will have the attention of the room focused on him. As soon as an Alpha Male walks into a bar, fifty sets of eyes will follow him, almost equally divided between male and female. He will have the respect of the room as soon as he walks in. The first reason for this is usually his looks; often tall, well dressed, good looking, yet still not over confident, the Alpha Male is easy to spot.

The Alpha Male makes the rules and breaks the rules. He sits how he wants to sit, he laughs when he wants to laugh, he talks about what he wants to talk about. He does whatever HE WANTS whenever he wants.

Though many mullets tend to have attitude and like conflict they still seem to be harmless at their core. The Diabolicmull, however has an air of deviance and are malicious by nature. We will view examples at various stages in life in order to get a clear idea of just how to identify the Diabolicmull.

We will work linear and start off with a child. As you can see from the picture on the left, the eyes are strangely devilish. On the right the mullet has this pointing thing going on which almost resembles devil horns.

Roughly 10 years later we see Diabolicmull enter his teenage years. The deviance brings strange behavior such as burning cigarette holes into the seats of 'friends' cars, tripping people for no apparent reason, flicking earlobes, etc.

The Adult Phase is next. The deviance often progress to illegal type activity- which means they tend to be in and out of jail. They have no true friends because they lie, therefore cannot be trusted. It is pretty easy to spot a Diabolicmull at this stage. You can usually find one lurking around a bus station pretending to be doing something really important.

The final stage is upon us, a mature Diabolicmull, well past his prime he has seen(and done) his time. The days of mischievous antics have ended. At this phase the decay is obvious. The Mullet is crusty and stringy and the fashion sense left 30 years ago. What remains the same however are the eyes. Go back and look at the child's eyes and you will notice an eerie similarity.